Sibling Tragedy

As the media sought to satisfy our morbid curiosity about the Boston Marathon bombers, my mind kept drifting to the fact that these were brothers.  It is another layer of tragedy on an already depressing event.

Tolstoy's insight is applicable here: "All happy families are alike.  But all unhappy families are unhappy in their own way."  In the best families, siblings will make an effort to encourage one another to be better.  They will resist the natural tendency to try to drag others down to their level, or to attempt to find comfort by sharing a weakness.  Where genuine love exists, one is willing to sacrifice personally to motivate and inspire his brothers and sisters to be better and happier people .  Often this is simply a matter of setting an unwavering example, which is at once the most effective and challenging teaching tool known to man.

 It should be the same with friends.  I visited a boy in jail on Sunday--I'll call him Jason.  He was doing a favor for a friend, giving him a ride.  His friend did something stupid and Jason is now facing multiple felony charges.  His friend failed to appreciate and respect the impact he could have on Jason.  He didn't care enough to act in Jason's best interest.  Instead, he was self-centered, with tragic consequences.

And the principle holds true with spouses as well. In the most successful marriages, each is caring enough to want the very best for her or his spouse.  They will both elevate their characters, not simply in a quest for self-improvement, but as a product of love and devotion, a sacrifice freely given, without promise, but with hope.

Somewhere along the way these young men in Boston lost sight of brotherly love.  Instead, they allowed the curable disease of hate to spread virally, from brother to brother, with fatal consequences.